Notice how a sweet child can suddenly turn into an angry teenager. I am talking angry and also mean. Hold on, there is a reason for this sudden change in personality.
Teenagers are in a transitional stage. What that means is they no longer fit or feel comfortable labeled as a child, or fit in as an adult. This transition period is often filled with anger because they are afraid. People often respond to change by exhibiting anger.
For teenagers, this transition can be both painful and liberating. Why? Now they will have more freedom but also more responsibilities and new expectations. Sometimes parents will need to remain calm and silent, while continuing to act and proceed like mature adults. Other times, the teenager just needs to be reassured that it will be just fine.
Teenagers will find it easier to hear what they don’t want to hear if the approach is offered in kindness knowing that they are respected and cared for even when challenged or corrected. Either way, parents will need to model the behaviors they would like to see implemented.
Life is like that. When you leave your comfort zone to enter into new territory it can be exciting yet somewhat intimidating, frightening, and overwhelming. The bottom line is transition is a process which results in personal growth.
Here are four ways that can help with any transition:
1. Keep your focus on what really is important. Your focus will determine the direction you will go.
2. Follow the 80/20 rule. Nothing in life is 100% to what you want it to be. Learn to be content with the 80%.
3. Never trade your 80% for the 20% you do not have. Many people get trapped by focusing on the 20%. This can have a profound effect on future decisions and allow the 20% to become more important than your 80%.
4. Unplug the technology and engage in more family fun and activities.
“Questioning and doubting, both understandable human responses, are opportunities to remind, reassure, and comfort those who are shaken by uncertainty”. – Randy Kilgore